[Felix continues rubbing her shoulders because she seems so nervous and he wants to prove there is nothing to be frightened of.]
Oh no. Nothing really. [Another pause, as he considers how to word this.]
I've only had two lovers, one was another altus. It turned out she wanted me only to disturb her father - show the old man he couldn't control her by sleeping with a weak mage. It would have caused a scandal, if not for the way my parents smoothed things over. She's married now, and has a daughter of her own.
The other was a man in Orlais, I met him while studying. He showed me how to experience a lot things, and I enjoyed them. I just didn't need them, I enjoyed his friendship far more. I lost touch with him after I was Blighted, but I hear he published some poetry.
My point is that anything that you want to experience with me, I'm happy to do so but my experience is pretty limited to know more than that. If I'm uncomfortable at the time, I'll say so. I would hope that you feel comfortable doing the same? If I ever try something you don't like, just say so and I'll stop.
[ Her hand stills against his chest when he tells her of this woman who used him. Anyone who hurts Felix is a terrible person and hopefully the woman has grown since then to see how awful she was. Ellana swallows past the lump forming in her throat and continues to listen without interrupting. ]
All right. I will. I'm sorry I'm so-- [ She struggles for a word that can encompass how she's acting, and she lifts her hand to wriggle her fingers in the air, like they'll grasp the word she needs. ] Worried? Like I said, this is new to me. [ She pauses, considering him, before shifting a little more towards him to cup his face in her hands. ]
We were both treated poorly, but if those relationships hadn't ended, we wouldn't have this now. I wouldn't have someone who understands me so well.
[ She smiles faintly, thumbs brushing against his skin. ]
I like what we have now -- the kisses and the touching. I know someday, I'll want to share more. But it's not something I need to be happy either. I just need you as you are.
[ She doesn't need a strong mage, or an elf. She's already a bad Dalish, so she's never going to further the People by having Dalish babies. ]
[He offers her a small smile.] And I just need you as you are.
[That, at least, he knows to his core. He would be happy with just this. Anything additional is nice, but just being able to share anything with her is what matters most to him.]
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blightedson) wrote2015-10-04 10:32 pm
no subject
Oh no. Nothing really. [Another pause, as he considers how to word this.]
I've only had two lovers, one was another altus. It turned out she wanted me only to disturb her father - show the old man he couldn't control her by sleeping with a weak mage. It would have caused a scandal, if not for the way my parents smoothed things over. She's married now, and has a daughter of her own.
The other was a man in Orlais, I met him while studying. He showed me how to experience a lot things, and I enjoyed them. I just didn't need them, I enjoyed his friendship far more. I lost touch with him after I was Blighted, but I hear he published some poetry.
My point is that anything that you want to experience with me, I'm happy to do so but my experience is pretty limited to know more than that. If I'm uncomfortable at the time, I'll say so. I would hope that you feel comfortable doing the same? If I ever try something you don't like, just say so and I'll stop.
no subject
All right. I will. I'm sorry I'm so-- [ She struggles for a word that can encompass how she's acting, and she lifts her hand to wriggle her fingers in the air, like they'll grasp the word she needs. ] Worried? Like I said, this is new to me. [ She pauses, considering him, before shifting a little more towards him to cup his face in her hands. ]
We were both treated poorly, but if those relationships hadn't ended, we wouldn't have this now. I wouldn't have someone who understands me so well.
[ She smiles faintly, thumbs brushing against his skin. ]
I like what we have now -- the kisses and the touching. I know someday, I'll want to share more. But it's not something I need to be happy either. I just need you as you are.
[ She doesn't need a strong mage, or an elf. She's already a bad Dalish, so she's never going to further the People by having Dalish babies. ]
no subject
[That, at least, he knows to his core. He would be happy with just this. Anything additional is nice, but just being able to share anything with her is what matters most to him.]
no subject
Now it seems silly to have been so nervous telling you my feelings on this.
no subject
No, it was understandable why you were nervous. This is such a personal subject.
Just know that I'm always here to talk.
no subject
And you know you can do the same with me, right? Whenever you want.
[ She lowers her hands back to her lap and scrunches up her face in a teasing look. ]
Though I may be a little slow to answer in the hours before dawn.